This week I am mostly feeling: Angry
I’m not really one for bad moods. They come occasionally, but they rarely linger. Which makes it weird that I have been grumpy since Monday. Not outwardly, but bubbling under. On the surface I’ve probably seemed my normal easy-going self, but just under the skin I’ve been angry at the world and ready to kill anyone that messed with me.
“South of Heaven” by Slayer. A great album. A classic in the true sense. Ground-breaking at the time of its release and still sounding good 20 years later. But it’s never a good sign when I feel the need to listen to it at full volume on my way to, and on my way back from, work for three days. Standing bolt upright on the train, staring straight ahead and willing someone to get in my way so I could crush them into a… you get the idea.
I have a good idea what’s caused all this.
Firstly, I got into a bit of a heated debate with a bunch of kids on Flickr. I took offence at some little scrote claiming that a bunch of other little scrotes who snuck into Camden tube station over Christmas and sprayed paint over all of the walls were some kind of heroes. Now I’ve never been a fan of graffiti/tagging, or ever really understood the thrill of mindless vandalism, but this incident in particular got me super-riled. The fact that illiterate teenagers kept responding to my arguments with nonsense just dragged out my anger. I’m still stewing about it now. I feel like someone’s Grandad chasing kids off his front wall. I’m only 31 for Pete’s sake.
Secondly, there’s the constant feeling of frustration at not being in a position to implement The Plan™ yet. I realise that’s in my hands to a large extent, and then I get frustrated and angry that I haven’t done more work to speed things up. I’m grimacing as I write this I’m so wound up.
Other things have kept the anger topped up as the week’s gone on. My old hosting company appearing to do everything in their power to stall my switch to a new host. The postman not delivering my new hoodie yet. Leo Sayer being such a lecherous, idiotic, self-obsessed twerp on CBB. An old friend visiting the UK for the first time in years, but not finding out because the other old friend who he is staying with neglected to tell me, and I found out through someone he did tell (who then went out and had a great time).
Friday just started, but I would like to start this week all over again please. I’m heading into the weekend with a rage the size of a small planet built up inside of me, which isn’t good when I have wardrobe doors to fit.
Add comment January 12th, 2007
